Easter Parade

This year was the Rabbit's first Easter (his affectionate mommy nickname

Jax Rabbit...get it? We used to call him bunny when he was a few months old...i let him grow out of that becuase I couldn't imagine calling a 13 year old Bunny accidentally in front of his friends and being forgiven. lol). Since Derek's parents live an hour away, and everyone wants to celebrate with the Rabbit, I decided let's party at my crib. This is always a perfect time to get my house perfected. A little pressure always gets things accomplished. ;) We loved having all of our family in to celebrate. Jax had a great time. His first egg hunt was a success. He kept picking up each egg and saying, "ball?" His new obsession is, you guessed it, any and all balls.

My friend M took these pictures at our church Easter bonanza. Little Z and the Rabbit are already fast friends. M is so talented don't you think? Thanks girl!!!!!!!


I have an app on my phone that allows you to black and white the picture, but leave color in certain areas...this picture is of his actual eye color...not doctored at all.

My centerpiece... I am so proud of that!!!!! My mom used to buy us Peeps! every Easter. I thought it was a nice nod to my childhood (and I didn't have to eat them....whew! they are interesting to the taste...it's like shooting up sugar). And next, my HUGE price saver of the week - MY FERN! I am so proud of thist plant!!!!! It spans about 3 feet and I purchased it on sale at Walmart for ..... (drumroll please) ..... 6 dollars. You heard me. I'm hearing gasps across blogland. I am so, so proud of that fern. Now if I can just keep it alive.

More pictures of my gorgeous rabbit and his very handsome daddy. I love my boys!!!!!

And just in case anyone thinks I have my life altogether, here is a picture of the ever-so-cute chick pinata that we had dangling out on the deck...Derek forgot to bring it in after the party and a huge thunderstorm swept through. Let's have a moment of silence for Mr. Chick. .....

I have several more pictures of what my house looked like after I did a mild overhaul. I will post them soon.

An Introduction to Grace

Almost every person I know has a story to tell. If you have no story, it's only because you don't feel like sharing it. I'm a storyteller by nature. It runs deep in my blood. I come from a long line of story tellers. At Christmas, there are rooms full of people who have the same blood...I have heard stories from my dad and his sibling's youth over and over, but they are told so wonderfully that you want to hear them told again. I love to make people emote. I love that my Mother-in-law sobs when I get her the perfect birthday gift. I love that my friends laugh so hard at my stories...well you know how girls are. So, readers, I begin this crazy and uncharted journey of blogville by sharing my story. For your sake, I will shorten a journey that I could talk about for days.

I don't know about any of you, but my church background was such that I have had trouble in my adult life with the grace of God and accepting love and grace and moving on. I'm one of those dweller types that just goes over and over what I could have done differently or what I should have done differently or what was expected of me. The perfectionist in me usually wins out and I end up berating myself for days. Now, in my head I understand this is pointless...futile even. But my heart still wants to "do the walk of shame to clear my name." There have been moments of reprieve, but let's be honest, it's my "bend". (a nod to you Pink Impact girls) I have been on a wonderfully complex journey of coming to understand the Grace of God.

Derek and I married in 2000 and while we weren't wanting children right away, at 22 I considered myself quite ancient and didn't want to put off parenting for too long. A year later, I began having several health issues that resulted in Chemo. That was a three year process of Chemo and surgeries and you name it people, during which I discovered that we weren't able to have children. It was a shocking blow. Even more so, because there was no ryhme or reason medically. I had several surgeries to fix any hindrances, so, my body just wouldn't keep a pregnancy. I begged. I pleaded. I prayed in faith. I had others do so too. I finally gave up quietly. I desperately wanted a child, but I even more desperately wanted to be the kind of woman that can build a good life even though Hope seems to fail.

then began September 2007. A normal, run of the mill month. I was a few weeks late. Not really unheard of for me...but on a joke with my husband I took one final test.

I cannot repeat the words that came out of my mouth. But 40 full weeks later Jaxon Tiger was given to me. Yes that's right...I wrote Tiger. My father's name is Jackson, who was named after his Grandfather Jackson, you get the picture. But I wanted a good meaning. Meanings are so important to me. One night I dug up an old baby naming book and it gave me the meaning of Jack as a derivitive of John: Hebrew for God is Gracious. I was sold. Derek chose the middle name for several personal reasons, but one being that he is an amazing golfer and a huge fan of Tiger Woods. Oh the scorn we endured. People can be so catty!!!! But I wasn't going to let shame keep Derek out of his dream too, so Tiger it is. One night a few weeks before I gave birth to our son, I was in his room praying. Scared that something might go wrong again...worried that if it didn't what kind of mother I would make...and more than that unable to find some grace in my spiritual walk with God. I heard so clearly God speak to my heart that He gave us our sons name to be a constant reminder to Derek and I that God is and will always be ferociously gracious.

He goes after us. He persues us with His grace. He isn't a bystander type of Father. He's a pick you up when you fall, dust you off when you're dirty, chase you down to the slums to bring you back home type of God. Those "hounds of heaven" you may have heard about when you were younger, they aren't out to get you...they are the Scotties and Westies and terrier types like I have, hunting and persuing you to hold you down and kiss you.

Charles Spurgeon said it best: "we (those that are in Christ) are today accepted in the Beloved, absolved from sin, acquitted at the bar of God. We are even now pardoned; even now are our sins put away; even now we stand accepted in the sight of God, as though we had never been guilty. There is not a sin in the book of God, even now, against one of His people. Who dares to lay anything to their charge? There is neither speck, nor spot, nor wrinkle, nor any such thing remaining upon any one believer in the matter of justification in the sight of the Judge of all the earth."

So while I'll probably blog most about motherhood, nesting (decorating for all those beginners), friends and just regular life in general...my blog is my constant reminder that in my life
God is Ferociously Gracious.